Add Unique: Jesus


If it doesn't fit anywhere else, it belongs here. Also, come here if you just need to get hammered.

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Tartarus Sorceror

Posts: 1698

Joined: Saturday, 18th June 2016, 13:57

Post Saturday, 22nd April 2017, 23:30

Add Unique: Jesus

A lean man in his mid-thirties, dark eyed, of an olive complexion, wearing his short, curly, black hair in a net. He has light shoes on, as well as a purple jumpsuit. He seems to delight himself in throwing orbs of the same colour with unerring precision. Sometimes, he also licks them. His accent is pretty thick.

Dialogue:
Abide, Dude, abide!
I see you rolled your way in here!
You don't fuck with the Jesus!
If you pull some idiot crazy shit on me like you flash a crossbow, I'll take it from you, stick it up your ass, and pull the trigger until it goes, "click!"


A unique human who launches three orbs of destruction at a time.

Also, he's getting his own movie this year!

(And I hope someone got the reference, so that I am not banned.)
I Feel the Need--the Need for Beer
Spoiler: show
3DSBeTr 15DSFiRu 3DSMoNe 3FoHuGo 3TrArOk 3HOFEVe 3MfGlOk 4GrEEVe 3BaIEChei 3HuMoOka 3MiWnQaz 3VSFiAsh 3DrTmMakh 3DSCKXom 3OgMoOka 3NaFiOka 3FoFiOka 3MuFEVeh 3CeHuOka 3TrMoTSO 3DEFESif 3DSMoOka 3DSFiOka

For this message the author Shtopit has received thanks: 3
Airwolf, Godmorgon, quik

Spider Stomper

Posts: 216

Joined: Saturday, 25th March 2017, 16:51

Post Saturday, 22nd April 2017, 23:32

Re: Add Unique: Jesus

The dude abides.
I may be strange but that's one of my favorite movies.
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Crypt Cleanser

Posts: 689

Joined: Sunday, 3rd June 2012, 13:10

Post Sunday, 23rd April 2017, 03:24

Re: Add Unique: Jesus

Eight year olds, dude.
Dearest Steve
thanks for the gym equipment
the plane crashed

bel

Cocytus Succeeder

Posts: 2184

Joined: Tuesday, 3rd February 2015, 22:05

Post Sunday, 23rd April 2017, 03:40

Re: Add Unique: Jesus

Zhorgal wrote:I may be strange but that's one of my favorite movies.

That's just, like, your opinion man.

Abyss Ambulator

Posts: 1193

Joined: Friday, 16th January 2015, 20:20

Post Sunday, 23rd April 2017, 22:34

Re: Add Unique: Jesus

Creep can roll.
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Halls Hopper

Posts: 80

Joined: Sunday, 8th January 2017, 05:05

Post Monday, 24th April 2017, 07:04

Re: Add Unique: Jesus

Jesus is the only unique in the game where you can choose to worship him or engage him in battle. He is extremely intelligent, can blink, will block off all exists, and always wields a +9 unique eudemon blade{everything+5}. He is extremely fast and his attack delay is .2

If you worship him you will gain the ability to walk in water, destroy holy beings, have a chance to be raised from the dead, and eventually becoming an angel with flying with enough piety.

If you destroy Jesus, you are able to gain some of his special loot.
Spoiler: show
hi

bel

Cocytus Succeeder

Posts: 2184

Joined: Tuesday, 3rd February 2015, 22:05

Post Monday, 24th April 2017, 07:10

Re: Add Unique: Jesus

I think the OP is talking about a different Jesus.

Ziggurat Zagger

Posts: 5382

Joined: Friday, 25th November 2011, 07:36

Post Monday, 24th April 2017, 21:32

Re: Add Unique: Jesus

Shtopit wrote:(And I hope someone got the reference, so that I am not banned.)

This is almost certainly one of the most well understood references among the crawl player base. You might as well ask if anyone here has heard of harry potter or likes star trek :)

Ziggurat Zagger

Posts: 8786

Joined: Sunday, 5th May 2013, 08:25

Post Tuesday, 25th April 2017, 04:34

Re: Add Unique: Jesus

may the force be with you (i hope someone gets this obscure refernecnce)

Ziggurat Zagger

Posts: 6454

Joined: Tuesday, 30th October 2012, 19:06

Post Tuesday, 25th April 2017, 04:56

Re: Add Unique: Jesus

duvessa wrote:may the force be with you (i hope someone gets this obscure refernecnce)

I think it's a reference to this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HPPj6viIBmU ?
Spoiler: show
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Mines Malingerer

Posts: 41

Joined: Wednesday, 26th April 2017, 01:40

Post Wednesday, 26th April 2017, 02:47

Re: Add Unique: Jesus

Love the Big Lebowski.

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