More lines for Donald!

[TwilightPhoenix]

Because I can't sleep, because I can't code a patch, let alone coax Crawl to compile, and because I'm sure I'm not the only one with some great ideas, here's a bunch of one-liners for Donald I came up with over time (though probably not all, I'm bound to fall asleep first). Apologies for any overlap with existing messages as I couldn't find where they were listed, though the late hour may have severely weakened my search-fu.


General

"Some guy kept slamming a door in my face. I hate that." (Referencing door dancing)
"Someone kept criticizing how I explored this place. I hate that." (Referencing blue names)
"I watched someone run up and down a staircase. I guess he was exercising?" (Stairdancing)
"I just landed here from a few floors up. I hate that." (Shaft traps)
You hear a distant "Zot!" "I hate those." (Zot traps, on a floor that has them or can have them)
Donald covers his ears, "Shut up!" (If the player is wielding the Singing Sword)



Based on player species

"Got milk?" (Minotaurs)
"I bet picking your nose sucks." (Trolls, Ghouls)
"So you're faster than me? I hate that." (Spriggans, Centaur, Felids)
"Bet you can't catch me." (Naga)
"At least you don't glitter. I hate glitter." (Vampires, though might be too much of a modern reference for Crawl)
"You better not bite me! I'm warning you, I ate some garlic not long ago!" (Vampire)
"I hate zombies." (Ghouls)



Based on player religion

"I ate a salad for lunch. You mad?" (Fedhas)
Donald suddenly glances into his gold pouch and finds some of it missing. "I hate that." (Zin)
Donald covers his ears, "Shut up!" (Zin)
Donald bows and submits to you. "Nah, just kidding." (Beogh)
"You're going to make me into a zombie? I hate that." (Kiku or Yred)
"I'm your eternal undead slave now? I hate that." (Yred if Donald is brought back with Enslave Soul)
A tear in reality attempts to devour Donald, but he leaps away at the last moment. "I hate that." (Lugonu)


Based on other uniques in LOS. Not sure if this is possible, but it'd be neat if he could reference them. Could also use religious lines towards uniques with them, such as Beogh lines to St. Roka and Okawaru lines to Wiglaf.

"So you're that guy everyone hates? You don't seem so scary." (Sigmund)
"People hate you more than me? I hate that." (Sigmund)
"I'm feeling some Deja Vu. I hate that." (Boris)
"You look familiar..." (Boris)
Donald tries to say something, but no words come out. He glares angrily at Mennas.
Donald looks at Wiglaf in shock, "You still exist!?"
"Minotaurs killed my friends and family too. It's no big deal." (Wiglaf)
"Keep your hand out of my pocket, or I'll cut it off." (Maurice)
Donald glances through his backpack and then shoots Maurice an angry glare. "That's it, I'm killing you next."
"You smell like the Shoals. I hate that." (Norris, referencing how he looks like a surfer in Tiles)
"I got turned into a statue once, it's no big deal." (Roxxane)
"I hate pigs/bacon." (Kirke)
"I hate dogs." (Grum)
"How many of you are there?" (Mara)
"You're traveling together? That's not fair." (Dowan and Duvessa)
"Ah, a bug! Kill it kill it kill it!" (Arachne)
"You're an ancient ruler? You don't look impressive to me." (Menkuare and Khufu)
"Who are you again?" (Menkaure, referencing the bit in his flavor text about how he was forgotten)
Donald yawns, "I hate that." (Aizul)
Donald doses off momentarily and then snaps awake. (Aizul)
"I hate fire." (Azrael)
"Whoa, watch where you're aiming!" (Azrael)
Donald searches his pack, "Now where's that flaming sword..." (Lernaean Hydra)
Donald glances at the Lernaean Hydra and then back to you, "Go ahead, he's all yours."
"Wimp." (Purgy)
"Entarex, huh? I think I tossed that sword into a pool a little bit ago." (Maud)
"You're on a quest to find a sword? I hate that." (Maud)

[cerebovssquire]

"Reduce your termsize for God's sake. Others want to see me kill you."

[Tiber]

The idea of commenting on nearby monsters is cool, but many of the uniques you have lines for only appear in different parts of the dungeon. Donald will never appear besides Sigmund unless you lead Sigmund down several sets of stairs.
More suggestions:

Do you come with an off switch? (worshiping TSO)
Reflecting attacks? I hate that. (worshiping Yred)
Great, now there will be twice the ugly around here. (Mara nearby)
Are you going to try and bore him to death? (Louise, referencing the Abyss)

[pratamawirya]

"This is a weird place to have a picnic, you know." (when the player carries a lot of food)

"Oh great... this is going to take forever." (when the player is an undead and wields a vampiric weapon)

[Sar]

"I ate a salad for lunch. You mad?" (Fedhas)

Please, no.

[KoboldLord]

The lines that refer to other uniques in LOS are probably only going to come up if a Yred-worshipping player decides to enslave Donald's soul and keep him around as a permanent sidekick. Which is likely to become significantly more common if Donald has some unique and funny lines that only trigger in just such a situation.

[Grimm]

Moved to Contributions.

[Kate]

I pushed a couple of these and removed some old obsolete lines. Currently he only comments on the current location and the player's god, although it's probably possible to add support for player species. Commenting on nearby monsters and features might be harder but I haven't actually looked at the database lookup code at all yet so maybe that's doable too.

[mumra]

I pushed a couple of these and removed some old obsolete lines. Currently he only comments on the current location and the player's god, although it's probably possible to add support for player species. Commenting on nearby monsters and features might be harder but I haven't actually looked at the database lookup code at all yet so maybe that's doable too.

Having looked at the DB code before it's technically possible - but I doubt it's really worth it unless there were more than a handful of new lines for this edge case (and in which case it could be fun to start adding these kind of lines to other uniques' speech as well, making the chance of actually seeing unique cross-chatter at least vaguely likely!)

Also I have no idea about performance. Each DB lookup needs a specific key, so you have to do a separate lookup for each possible key. In other words, any time any monster says anything you'd have to check for all uniques in LOS and then lookup a modified speech key with each unique's name, and while you're doing that you might as well include the names of normal monsters in LOS, so Donald could actually comment on that Eldritch Tentacle you just summoned

[dpeg]

It would certainly be extremely cool to have uniques comment on monsters, spells etc. Such things make the speech feel a lot more natural and less slot-machine like. If doing this, it should certainly not be restricted to Donald.

[TwilightPhoenix]

Pretty cool seeing a couple of my lines getting in. And I could certainly work up some more lines for Donald commenting on uniques or cross-chatter between any uniques.


Also...

"Hey, I just met some ghost claiming to be (random character name in the bones, off the high score list, or in the morgue folder). Do you know them?"

[mumra]

When Donald spawns near any other unique:

"Whoa ... another unique! That's got to be a bug, right?"

[Grimm]

"Look how many x you have! Must be a clustering illusion. I hate that."

[pratamawirya]

"So... what did you do with that artefact crystal plate mail?" (when the player is a troll/ogre/spriggan (if possible, the artefact CPM could be changed to whatever cool armor the player actually found but can't wear))

"Water-walking orc messiah? Hey, I can do that too, and I'm not even an orc."

"My uncle was a jack-of-all-trades too. And guess what? He's dead." (when the player has trained too many skills)

[TwilightPhoenix]

More for Donald with other uniques. I know some of them can't normally be encountered together, but there are always OoD and Sprint exceptions, as well as players dragging Donald, or other uniques, around.

"Hey, can you roast this marshmallow for me?" (Any of the fire themed uniques, like Azrael, Margery, Xtahua, etc. Also could trigger for players heavily invested in Fire Magic)

"Your princess is in another branch." (Prince Ribbit)
"No, for the last time, I'm not going to kiss you. I'm not even a princess!"

"You're always in your brother's shadow? Sucks to be you/I love that." (Edmund, I like the former option but it might not be as equally liked by everyone else)

"So what happens when your followers try to walk on water with you?" (St. Roka or for players following Beogh)
"Wait, there's TWO of you running around?" (St. Roka AND the player following Beogh, referring to both of them claiming to be the Orcish messiah. Possibly could be clarified a bit, I'll come back to this one)

"Can I borrow your hide for a second? I need some new armor." (Xtahua or however you spell that)
"Your breath stinks."

Donald stares at Crazy Yuif, confused.
"If I give you a hammer, will you go away?"
"I have no clue what you're even trying to say."
"Why do you even collect hammers if you're not going to use them?"