Generic Brainstorming!


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Blades Runner

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Post Tuesday, 17th January 2012, 12:54

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Pteriforever wrote:Brands for wands.
Grimm wrote:Like, Gucci wands?



Off-brands?
You hit the hydra with the scimitar of flames (Costco).
The hydra is burned!
A high-fashion elf snickers at your cheap weapon (X3).

Counterfeit brands?
You zap Sigmund with the wand of cold (Sorny).
A flurry of snowflakes appears in Sigmund's general vicinity.
Sigmund raises an eyebrow.
Sigmund eviscerates you with his Scythe of Draining!
You die...

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Ziggurat Zagger

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Post Tuesday, 17th January 2012, 14:52

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

You examine the wand.
It reads "Made in China".
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Sewers Scotsman

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Post Tuesday, 17th January 2012, 17:01

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Grimm wrote:You examine the wand.
It reads "Made in China".

Edit: It reads "Made in China (by exiled Mountain Dwarves)".

Ziggurat Zagger

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Post Tuesday, 17th January 2012, 17:08

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

They emigrated to China for the greater business opportunities. A skilled dwarf can make a tidy tax-free pile there.
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Sewers Scotsman

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Post Tuesday, 17th January 2012, 19:28

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Grimm wrote:They emigrated to China for the greater business opportunities. A skilled dwarf can make a tidy tax-free pile there.

Yup, that's what they tell you before you hand over the cash to pay for your trip there.

Ziggurat Zagger

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Post Tuesday, 17th January 2012, 19:36

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Then when you get there you find you're in debt and have to work as a dwarfstitute to pay back your "handlers".
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Sewers Scotsman

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Post Tuesday, 17th January 2012, 21:01

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Grimm wrote:Then when you get there you find you're in debt and have to work as a dwarfstitute to pay back your "handlers".

- churning out fake wands on the production line. And when you do get wages you're only allowed to spend them in the forge shop, with its over-inflated prices...

Ziggurat Zagger

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Post Tuesday, 17th January 2012, 21:14

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

And you never get to see the Great Wand of China.*






* "Wand" means "wall" in German.
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Sewers Scotsman

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Post Tuesday, 17th January 2012, 21:26

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

But then one day you hear about the writings of the great thinker, Crawl Marx - better known than any of his brothers, and for good reason. And you begin to wonder...

Abyss Ambulator

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Post Tuesday, 17th January 2012, 21:58

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Nahh, Marxism has no place in Crawl. "To each according to his needs" is the first thing that the RNG chucks out the window.
You fall off the wall. You have a feeling of ineptitude.

Ziggurat Zagger

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Post Tuesday, 17th January 2012, 22:13

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

We're trying to save dwarves in China. Please leave us to our work.
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Slime Squisher

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Post Tuesday, 17th January 2012, 23:47

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Simple -- Build a second dungeon below China. Then, dwarves will go in and mighrt come out super-rich.

Ziggurat Zagger

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Post Tuesday, 17th January 2012, 23:51

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

New branch proposal: China. Full of dwarves and cheap wands.
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Vestibule Violator

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Post Wednesday, 18th January 2012, 06:32

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

  Code:

Readonly. You. All.
    /

   0 ____|_
  {|--;--;
  / \               
¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯
If you find any mistakes or typos in my post, feel free to PM me about it. Thanks in advance!

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Through each ripple and wave...
Through every living being...
The Verse binds us all as one.
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Vestibule Violator

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Post Wednesday, 18th January 2012, 09:38

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

  Code:
The +27, +12 hammer of Bahn {freeze, Dam+9, *Rage, rPois, rF+}

This hammer was forged by a man who wanted to cleanse the world from the creatures who, as he thought, did not deserve to exist,
and to do so by all means possible. However, he did not know that his mind was not clear enough to use such a weapon wisely
and ended his life in dreadful agony, his life fluids drained by his own desperate rage.
Be wiser than him and do not repeat his mistakes.

This weapon has a chance to banish the creature it hits, and can be safely unwielded.
This weapon can make you pursue the victim relentlessly, paying no attention to anything else (*Mesm).
If you find any mistakes or typos in my post, feel free to PM me about it. Thanks in advance!

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Through every living being...
The Verse binds us all as one.
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Sewers Scotsman

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Post Wednesday, 18th January 2012, 11:43

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Grimm wrote:New branch proposal: China. Full of dwarves and cheap wands.

And communists.

Ziggurat Zagger

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Post Wednesday, 18th January 2012, 17:11

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Communist wizards.
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Sewers Scotsman

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Post Wednesday, 18th January 2012, 21:15

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Communist wizards making large profits from their dwarven manufactories. They have quite a set-up.

Ziggurat Zagger

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Post Wednesday, 18th January 2012, 21:30

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Spitting on Crawl Marx's grave! They should be ashamed of themselves.
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Slime Squisher

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Post Wednesday, 18th January 2012, 21:56

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Special versions of all the potions designed specifically for use by ball pythons.
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Slime Squisher

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Post Thursday, 19th January 2012, 23:33

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Crawl creepypasta.

Vaults Vanquisher

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Post Thursday, 19th January 2012, 23:49

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Confidence Interval wrote:Communist wizards making large profits from their dwarven manufactories. They have quite a set-up.


Toady one's next triumph: Slaves of Armok III: Dwarves in China. Insane communist wizard dwarves fight for survival.

Edit: wait nevermind, that's dwarf fortress.

Mines Malingerer

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Post Friday, 20th January 2012, 00:47

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

I kinda imagine figure that the orc priest is rallying all the oppressed orcs to liberate the dungeon for Crawl Marx

"from each orc according to his weapon, to each according to his thirst for plunder"
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Shoals Surfer

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Post Friday, 20th January 2012, 06:46

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Pteriforever wrote:Crawl creepypasta.

THIS IS THE STORY OF A DAY WHERE THERE WAS ALL THIS OOD. A MDFi WAS WALKING AROUND AND OOD STARTED COMING AT HIM EVERYWHERE. THERE WAS SO MUCH OOD THAT IT FILLED UP ALL D:1. HE WENT TO THE TEMPLE AND THERE WAS JUST OOD ALL OVER THE PLACE! MDFI WAS RUNNING FROM THEM AND HE WAS ALL TELEPORTED OUT. HE TRIED TO GO SWIMMING AND ALL OF THE SHARKS WENT NUTS AND BITTENED EVERYBODY. HE GOT CHASED BY ALL THE UNIQUES EVER. ONE TIME THE OOD GOT BORIS AND CEREBOV. AT THE END OF THE DAY DEVELOPERS DECIDED THEY WOULD SEND MDFi TO SPACE SO THAT HE WOULD STOP GETTING OOD EVERY WHERE. THE SCARIEST PART IS THAT THE MDFi WAS YOU!!! (OR HE WAS A SpEn IF YOU ARE A SpEn) AND YOU FORGOT THAT THIS HAPPENED.

Original source

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Slime Squisher

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Post Saturday, 21st January 2012, 02:12

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Death Butterflies.

You have a small chance of getting them when you cast Summon Butterflies at high spellpower.
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Tartarus Sorceror

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Post Saturday, 21st January 2012, 02:16

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Pteriforever wrote:Death Butterflies.

You have a small chance of getting them when you cast Summon Butterflies at high spellpower.

They do 4 times more damage then a regular butterfly.
What made you happy today?
Shatari wrote:I traded a goat for a Nintendo DS XL, and a ton of games.

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Slime Squisher

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Post Saturday, 21st January 2012, 02:43

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Maybe they could make "amulet of stasis" appear in magenta on the inventory screen? After all, magenta means dangerous and you don't get all that much more dangerous than something that blocks all your escapes.
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Vestibule Violator

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Post Saturday, 21st January 2012, 07:07

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Pteriforever wrote:After all, magenta means dangerous and you don't get all that much more dangerous than something that blocks all your escapes.

Now I am afraid of Barbies.
If you find any mistakes or typos in my post, feel free to PM me about it. Thanks in advance!

The Verse flows throughout Aquaria...
Through each ripple and wave...
Through every living being...
The Verse binds us all as one.
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Shoals Surfer

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Post Saturday, 21st January 2012, 11:11

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

MyOtheHedgeFox wrote:
Pteriforever wrote:After all, magenta means dangerous and you don't get all that much more dangerous than something that blocks all your escapes.

Now I am afraid of Barbies.

Why do you even have them in your inventory?
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Vestibule Violator

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Post Saturday, 21st January 2012, 12:20

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

PerverseSuffering wrote:
MyOtheHedgeFox wrote:
Pteriforever wrote:After all, magenta means dangerous and you don't get all that much more dangerous than something that blocks all your escapes.

Now I am afraid of Barbies.

Why do you even have them in your inventory?

I HAVE THEM IN MY INVENTORY?!
(terribable shriek)
If you find any mistakes or typos in my post, feel free to PM me about it. Thanks in advance!

The Verse flows throughout Aquaria...
Through each ripple and wave...
Through every living being...
The Verse binds us all as one.

Lair Larrikin

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Post Monday, 23rd January 2012, 22:07

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Pteriforever wrote:Crawl creepypasta.


ONCE THERE WAS THIS GRIL IN HIGHSCHOOL WHO STARTED VICTORY DANCING NOW THAT YOU HAVE STARTED READING THIS YOU CANNOT STOP. THE GIRL STARTED PLAYING A COMPUTER GAME CALLED CRAWL AND EVERY DAY SHE PLAYED IT FOR LONGER AND LONGER. IT WAS A GAME WHERE IT HAD BLACK MAGIC AND THINGS IN IT. IT WAS A GAME ABOUT SUMMONING DEMONS OMG! HER FAMILLY COULDN'T GET HER
TO STOP EVEN TO EAT OR GO TO THE BATHROOM. THEY TRIED EVERYTHING BUT SHE STARVED TO DEATH. THEN THEY WENT TO HER ROOM AND SAID HERE NAME BUT SHE WAS DEAD. HER SUICIDE NOTE WAS ROLLED UP BESIDE HER AND IT SAID "TITTS MICMONONONOMO" ON THE OUTSIDE. THEN THEY READ THE NOTE OUTLOUD AND HER SKELETON EXPLODED OUT OF HER BODDY AND HER DISEMBODIED HEART FLOATED ABOVE ITS HEAD ZOMG1!! THERE WAS BLLOD AND PIECES OF HER ALLOVER AND HER MOM WAS ALL LIKE "JESSICA NOOOOO!" IF YOU DON'T POST THIS IN 10 OTHER TOPICS JESSICA WILL BEGIN TO APPEAR WHEN YOU LEAST EXPECT IT. THIS MEANS HER SPIRIT IS NOT AT REST. IF YOU DO NOT FOLLOW THE DIRECTIONS IN THIS POST THIS JESSICA WILL COME FOR YOU RIGHT WHEN YOU GO TO BED AT NIGHT.

SLEEP TIGHT LOLOL

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Slime Squisher

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Post Tuesday, 24th January 2012, 00:47

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Add the sixfirhy as a playable race, because we need more demonic races and they seem as good a choice as any.
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Sewers Scotsman

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Post Tuesday, 24th January 2012, 15:07

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

I'm sick of fighting orcs. Instead of fighting them I would like to be able to play them at cards (or using dice, possibly) and win their weapons and gold off them.
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Shoals Surfer

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Post Tuesday, 24th January 2012, 18:26

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Confidence Interval wrote:I'm sick of fighting orcs. Instead of fighting them I would like to be able to play them at cards (or using dice, possibly) and win their weapons and gold off them.

I prefer playing hit dice.

Ziggurat Zagger

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Post Tuesday, 24th January 2012, 18:54

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

A friendly arm-wrestling match would be a nice change.
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Slime Squisher

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Post Wednesday, 25th January 2012, 00:57

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Dear Orc Sorcerer #35,

Buy me the book of Summonings I always wanted and I will spare you and all your kin.

Yours dishonestly,
Pteriforever the DrSu.

Lair Larrikin

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Post Wednesday, 25th January 2012, 05:40

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Donald says, "You're cheating. I hate that."

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Sewers Scotsman

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Post Wednesday, 25th January 2012, 09:35

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Grimm wrote:A friendly arm-wrestling match would be a nice change.

Yes, if you're a Troll. Not if you're a Spriggan.
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Crypt Cleanser

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Post Wednesday, 25th January 2012, 11:53

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

In this case take the bet and run away. :P
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Vestibule Violator

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Post Wednesday, 25th January 2012, 15:42

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Or climb into a gauntlet.
If you find any mistakes or typos in my post, feel free to PM me about it. Thanks in advance!

The Verse flows throughout Aquaria...
Through each ripple and wave...
Through every living being...
The Verse binds us all as one.
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Tartarus Sorceror

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Post Wednesday, 25th January 2012, 16:05

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Grimm wrote:A friendly arm-wrestling match would be a nice change.

The problem is that friendly arm-wrestling matches quickly turn into unfriendly arm-wrestling matches and people in unfriendly arm-wrestling matches tend to use items which give them a advantage such as clubs, daggers, sabres, etc.
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Crypt Cleanser

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Post Wednesday, 25th January 2012, 16:45

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Real gentleman use a foil or a rapier.

Ziggurat Zagger

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Post Wednesday, 25th January 2012, 16:58

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

With Spriggans they'd thumb-wrestle. Obviously.
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Sewers Scotsman

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Post Thursday, 26th January 2012, 09:21

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

varsovie wrote:Real gentleman use a foil or a rapier.

Real gentlemen use their wit.
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Tartarus Sorceror

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Post Thursday, 26th January 2012, 14:24

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

varsovie wrote:Real gentleman use a foil or a rapier.

I prefer a good pen.
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Shatari wrote:I traded a goat for a Nintendo DS XL, and a ton of games.
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Shoals Surfer

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Post Thursday, 26th January 2012, 14:34

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

How about a Gentleman class? You get to wear a monocle (acute eyesight) as a mutation, and you must always hold your trident in your left hand and your sabre in your right!
No poison, of course.
Last edited by PerverseSuffering on Thursday, 26th January 2012, 15:08, edited 1 time in total.
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Tartarus Sorceror

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Post Thursday, 26th January 2012, 14:43

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

PerverseSuffering wrote:How about a Gentleman class? You get to wear a monocle (acute eyesight) as a mutation, and you must always hold your trident with your left hand and your sabre in your right!
No poison, of course.

I approve of this idea. However, in order to have a special mutation it would have to be a species.
What made you happy today?
Shatari wrote:I traded a goat for a Nintendo DS XL, and a ton of games.
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Shoals Surfer

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Post Thursday, 26th January 2012, 15:08

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Jabberwocky wrote:
PerverseSuffering wrote:How about a Gentleman class? You get to wear a monocle (acute eyesight) as a mutation, and you must always hold your trident with your left hand and your sabre in your right!
No poison, of course.

I approve of this idea. However, in order to have a special mutation it would have to be a species.


Aw, I forgot that. Well, let it be starting euqipment, then.

Ziggurat Zagger

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Post Thursday, 26th January 2012, 18:56

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

The Gentleman wields his weapon with his pinky out.
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Shoals Surfer

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Post Thursday, 26th January 2012, 19:26

Re: Generic Brainstorming!

Grimm wrote:The Gentleman wields his weapon with his pinky out.

Auxiliary attack!
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