The Tavern

Last night I dreamed that I was swimming, and I could swim really fast. Han Solo and R2D2 were on a little boat, fishing to get fish to supply their fish and chips restaurant. They'd caught a lot of fish. They had like six hooks per line and I was all "hey I don't think that's legal" and Han said "be cool, man" and they boated away.

I woke up feeling a little sad that I hadn't ever gotten fish and chips on my recent trip to London but then remembered it's Lent in Wisconsin so fried fish is basically everywhere.

damn I want some fried fish

So one time I was dreaming that I was happy and doing well, but my fiancée and family pushed me to go to a psychiatrist anyway because they felt like something was wrong. Standing in the waiting room I noticed that the little name placard for the doctor was unintelligible which isn't too odd for a dream so I let it go. I was called in and sat down and the doctor who was previously concealed in shadow leaned forward to reveal a mangled face with nothing but flaps of oozing skin in place of a nose and mouth. His eyes bulged, bloodshot, from their sockets and his breath hissed and wheezed as he looked me over and I realised then with slow and horrific clarity that I could see the faces of my loved ones staring back at me in the reflection of his eyes

HOLY CRAP THAT DREAM

I like my fish one better

I dreamt that my nose was made of Germany.

njvack wrote:Last night I dreamed that I was swimming, and I could swim really fast. Han Solo and R2D2 were on a little boat, fishing to get fish to supply their fish and chips restaurant. They'd caught a lot of fish. They had like six hooks per line and I was all "hey I don't think that's legal" and Han said "be cool, man" and they boated away.

I woke up feeling a little sad that I hadn't ever gotten fish and chips on my recent trip to London but then remembered it's Lent in Wisconsin so fried fish is basically everywhere.

damn I want some fried fish

regret over lack of participation in anti-authoritarian youth culture, fish is a stand in for social capital*

ZipZipskins wrote:So one time I was dreaming that I was happy and doing well, but my fiancée and family pushed me to go to a psychiatrist anyway because they felt like something was wrong. Standing in the waiting room I noticed that the little name placard for the doctor was unintelligible which isn't too odd for a dream so I let it go. I was called in and sat down and the doctor who was previously concealed in shadow leaned forward to reveal a mangled face with nothing but flaps of oozing skin in place of a nose and mouth. His eyes bulged, bloodshot, from their sockets and his breath hissed and wheezed as he looked me over and I realised then with slow and horrific clarity that I could see the faces of my loved ones staring back at me in the reflection of his eyes

ego-authenticity insecurity, coupled with fears of cultural ideology made malevolent*

*note these are symbolic interpretations based on my understanding of the 'I' as an implied fictional character wholly existent within the context of the narrative, independent of any actual persona you may or may not have implicitly or explicitly demonstrated here, or in real life, and no diagnosis should be inferred or implied from this text

Jeremiah wrote:I dreamt that my nose was made of Germany.

That was no dream

njvack wrote:HOLY CRAP THAT DREAM

I like my fish one better

so do I, I wish I had it instead

last night i had my 2nd dream ever involving felicia day. i don't remember anything else about the dream, just that she was involved somehow

last night i had a dream that a toilet in my house exploded and started spewing poop everywhere and i didn't know what to do. then i woke up into another dream. i was relieved that my toilet was ok. in this other dream i was a furry and i went to a party for furries. in this dream, furries didn't dress up as animals, instead the furries actually were part-animal part-human. i was 100% human but i still had a furry fetish so i counted as a furry. anyway, the party had a centaur, a mermaid, and a red-haired woman who was 30% fox, and a bunch of other people. the fox woman and i talked for a while and we were really hitting it off and kind of falling in love with each other, but then i had to leave because i had to solve a bunch of puzzles in ancient egyptian ruins. then i woke up. it's probably a good thing i woke up when i did because i don't really want "dreamed about having sex with 30% of a fox" to be in the list of things i've done

idk what prompted this dream because im definitely not a furry. i do like foxes though

duvessa wrote:idk what prompted this dream because im definitely not a furry. i do like foxes though

In denial are we, minmay?

duvessa wrote:a centaur, a mermaid

"monster girls are not furry"

i dont know the technical terminology. i just know that foxes have cute ears

So even if you aren't a furry you'd be cool with your partner wearing just fox ears

hell yeah i would dude, who wouldn't. well, assuming the ears didn't get cut off an actual fox. that would be gross

I mean yeah you're right I just wanted to make sure I understood your position

i think those tail buttplugs are pretty weird though

duvessa wrote:i don't really want "dreamed about having sex with 30% of a fox" to be in the list of things i've done

I don't know, it depends on which 30%.

There are a lot of definitions for "furry" and the "furry fandom" out there, and a lot of them aren't sexual. Pretty much anything that includes walking, talking animals can is considered "furry" by someone out there.

that certainly sounds like something that'd want you to believe

njvack wrote:
duvessa wrote:i don't really want "dreamed about having sex with 30% of a fox" to be in the list of things i've done

I don't know, it depends on which 30%.

Does it really? I'm curious

if it helps, a reasonable (albeit not perfect) approximation of what the woman in my dream looked like is "someone cosplaying holo from spice and wolf, except with clothes on"

This is the kind of hard-hitting, up-to-the-minute reporting we NEED around here

ZipZipskins wrote:
njvack wrote:I don't know, it depends on which 30%.

Does it really? I'm curious

What can I say? I like a good slice of torso.

also, doing an image search to remember what holo looks like was a BIG mistake that i really should have anticipated

Did you mean without clothes on I imagine

duvessa wrote:if it helps, a reasonable (albeit not perfect) approximation of what the woman in my dream looked like is "someone cosplaying holo from spice and wolf, except with clothes on"

So she had no genitalia? Interesting...

njvack wrote:
ZipZipskins wrote:
njvack wrote:I don't know, it depends on which 30%.

Does it really? I'm curious

What can I say? I like a good slice of torso.

I'm surprised it took this many posts to get a reply like that.

ZipZipskins wrote:Did you mean without clothes on I imagine

no, I meant with clothes on. IIRC, Holo has worn clothes like, 2 times ever, total

minmay would you please look at my sig and ask the question contained therein

arrhy would you fuck an animal whose top half is a fish and whose bottom half is a cow

just point me at that and tell me how much I have to pay and how long I get

arrhy pls respond

i had to throw away 13 eggs yesterday and i was really sad because i knew i wasn't going to eat the eggs in time and i should have fed them to a fox instead of waiting for them to go bad and then wasting them

That reminds me of a time in crawl when I ascended with eight potions of haste

duvessa wrote:it's probably a good thing i woke up when i did because i don't really want "dreamed about having sex with 30% of a fox" to be in the list of things i've done

You might say she was _distressingly_ furry..

i had a sex dream a couple nights ago. now, you might think it's kind of strange for an asexual person to have sex dreams. and i'd agree with you! i rarely have them. but sometimes they happen, and here is an example

i had a dream that an evil demon lord was going to destroy the world, and to stop him, i had to go on a pilgrimage to a mountain, and i had to go along a specific path, which included going through a bunch of ancient temples that were filled with traps and puzzles and monsters. in one of the puzzles, there were like 4 libraries that were run by skeletons, and you had to check out the correct books from each library to get a secret passage to open. this was actually pretty easy, because the skeletons told me exactly which books i needed to check out. i guess they thought the puzzle was stupid.
in another one of the puzzles, there was a door with a woman standing in front of it, and the puzzle was that to open the door you had to have sex with her. there was no other way to get past. so eventually i was like "ugh, okay, I'll just try to get this over with quickly", and luckily i had a condom. about a minute after solving this puzzle, i ran into my girlfriend, and had to explain what happened, but she understood perfectly and wasn't mad or anything. i was on the brink of crying myself though. then we did the next part of the journey together, which was to climb up a really big hill with a town at the top of it, and gather as much corn as possible on the way (the hill was covered with corn). then in the town i built some sort of flying machine and flew it to the mountain and killed the demon lord and saved the world.
then i had sex with my girlfriend

i've had a lot of dreams where i'm actually gay/straight/lesbian/etc. instead of asexual. but this is the first continuous dream i've had where my sexual orientation changed during the course of it

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6l1GvDWtccI

arrhythmia goddammit answer the question

All I really know about furry conventions is they apparently do the most damage to hotels. Rainfurrest is held in seattle and it got banned after people destroyed plumbing and flooded the rooms underneath them. They canceled the one for this year because they couldn't find a space willing to host them.

Sources:
https://www.reddit.com/r/furry/comments ... attendees/

Above link includes this damage report:

For the last few years, the Hilton sustained more damage during RainFurrest than it did from every other event at the Hilton the entire rest of the year. This doesn’t even include damage to guest rooms or other incidental wear and tear like the elevators.
This year’s incidents include two plumber calls, a flooded bathroom that soaked the offices underneath, towels stuffed into a hot tub pump, and multiple petty vandalisms and thefts. A final damage report is still being compiled.
We had to send three people to the hospital and call the police twice.
By Sunday morning of con this year, the hotel was so exasperated that they were threatening to evict attendees for single noise complaints.

https://www.flayrah.com/6429/rainfurres ... find-venue

most conventions destroy hotels, though. i always had this theory that when a sufficient number of people with the same interest gather in one place, the spirit of keith moon manifests within them. come to think of it though, i can totally see the fox girl blowing up a hotel toilet, because she'd been completely fucked over by the capitalist establishment and was really mad about that - i remember the courts decided that since she was 30% fox she only had to be paid 70% of minimum wage (which was already way too low) and in this dream it was practically impossible to get a job with any kind of night shift, which really sucked since she was nocturnal. we had a plan to solve this, and it was either for me to financially support her, or for us to start a revolution. i forget which

In my last dream, I was doing sexual acts with someone, but she had a piety counter, like most Crawl gods do. It would go up slowly, but when she wasn't pleased, it would go down quite rapidly, and I remember being quite frustrated in my dream because it constantly fluctuated between 2 and 3 stars and wouldn't go any higher no matter what I did.

I believe this was also my first Crawl-related dream.

and people say fast piety decay is a good mechanic

still not as stupid as that scene in god of war 3

i had a dream last night that duvessa and i were a few years younger, like, high school age again. and we decided to go through a rebellious teenager phase together, and do something extremely illegal. so we got some other people together and built a huge "kinetic sculpture" in the middle of my old hometown, without permission. it mainly revolved around miniature train cars on tracks, which were propelled by bottle rockets, while shooting various other fireworks into the air. (the tracks were several km each and there were full track-switching systems etc.) the train cars would also make a bunch of stunt jumps in the process, live bears were involved, and the whole show required a rube-goldberg-esque chain reaction of things going exactly right; train cars had to ignite the bottle rockets on the next train car as they passed it, at exactly the right time; there were various parts where people or bears stood on top the cars, even as they went over the jumps (these miniature train cars were only slightly bigger than skateboards); if someone, or a bear, fell off their car, the whole thing would be ruined.
so at like midnight, we started the show, and somehow everything went EXACTLY right; it lasted like 3 hours and all the jumps worked perfectly, the bears behaved perfectly, none of the fireworks were duds, the train cars reached speeds of 400 km/h, everyone nailed jumping on and off of the train cars and doing tricks on them, despite the fact they were moving at 400 km/h and making turns and jumps themselves. the audience was amazed and gave us millions of dollars. the whole thing felt incredible, and when it was finally over duvessa and i just ran up to each other and held each other kissed passionately while i ran my fingers through her silky blue hair, because we were both absolutely thrilled and couldn't think of any other way to express it.

we never got arrested or fined or faced any sort of legal penalties, which surprised us in the dream, but that part was actually quite realistic because in real life, the police in that town took 3 years before they did anything about a guy who was making and setting off literal bombs.

edit: added more detail

I had a dream a day ago that devs removed removed all AoE attacks from Crawl because they robbed players of choice of which monster to attack first, and I threw a shit fit on Tavern about it.

Sar wrote:I had a dream a day ago that devs removed removed all AoE attacks from Crawl because they robbed players of choice of which monster to attack first, and I threw a shit fit on Tavern about it.

You be careful the devs SAY they don't get many ideas from the tavern

duvessa wrote:it's probably a good thing i woke up when i did because i don't really want "dreamed about having sex with 30% of a fox" to be in the list of things i've done

There is something deeply wrong with you.

The other day I had a dream where i was female and I took off my shirt in an attempt to be sexually provocative but it didn't work. Like at all. Which sucked.

I had a dream a few nights ago that my life sort of partially turned into a video game, and I had to fight this evil demon guy who was going to take over the world (yes, another one, but this one was more monster-y, he had tentacles and stuff and he was always nude). and I was supposed to go through 100 levels and fight him at levels 25, 50, 75, and finally 100 to win. but i couldn’t find the first levels so i just drove my car to level 25 which was just a rectangular pit somewhere in town with the demon guy in it. i fought him by ramming my car into him until i won and he ran away.

then i couldn’t find the next level either so i drove to level 50 which was in oregon, and i was a little underleveled but i had about 63 lives plus some fairy bottles so i wasn’t worried. level 50 was also just a big pit in the ground withe demon guy standing in it. with the xp from beating him the first time i’d gained the ability to drive my car telepathically without being inside it, so i simultaneously rammed him with my car and did sick punch/kick combos on him until he ran away.

then i noticed a bus going to california, which was where the next set of levels was, and almost nobody else was going on it, and i was feeling lazy so i got on the bus instead of driving. this time i actually did find levels 51 through 7
4, but i decided to keep my momentum going and skipped them yet again to do level 75 right away. level 75 wasn’t a pit, it was a big room inside an abandoned factory. i didn’t have my car to ram into the demon guy anymore but i had found a sword on the ground, so i fought him with that and beat him pretty easily although it took 1 fairy bottle. after i beat him he went through a portal in the back of the room, which went directly to the level 100 final boss arena, and of course i decided to skip levels 76 through 99 again and just go ahead and follow him through the portal and kill him and save the world and have everyone love me and finally feel like my life had a net positive effect on the world for once, and also i wanted to forget that i left my (now completely trashed) car in the middle of some town in oregon, but i woke up before i could go through the portal

i had a dream last night that i was inside a house, involved in some kind of group activity with people of all ages. i can't really remember what kind of group it was. i think it was like some kind of painting/crafts thing, but the dream was mostly about this 10 year old boy. for most of the dream i hated his guts because he kept causing trouble. i think it was mostly having a temper and small vandalism, and stuff like that, but the details are very hazy. towards the end of the dream i found out his mother was a radiologist and he stole MRI scans from her hospital to look at them, and then i liked him a bit more. the only other person i remember is a lady about 65 years old who was pretty stern, but again, no details i can recall.

edit: @duvessa i get that partial video game dream style very frequently myself

duvessa wrote:also, doing an image search to remember what holo looks like was a BIG mistake that i really should have anticipated

One individual's mistake is another's find of the day.

Pls no furry again.

The Tavern

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