4000 THANK QUEST

[bcadren]

Announce "Time for a Celeprogramation, Cheese for everypony!" And slice the brick of cheese with the scythe.

[WingedEspeon]

g). That worked well last time.

[nago]

This is quickly becoming the best game ever made

[duvessa]

You try to put Ijyb's pants over Crazy Yiuf's head, but they won't fit over the light bulb. Crazy Yiuf swings his brick of Jarlsberg cheese and hits you in the left jugular vein. (-7 HP)

  Code:

HP: ====-------------- 4/18
PP: ============== 14/14
GP: =========----- 9/14
AC: -4

Key
Ijyb's pants (1AC)
the cursed -7 helmet of Okawaru's Regard {Stlth-} (worn) (-6AC)
Terence's pants (1AC)
Wand of enslavement with hair bow (16)
July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
Prune chip cluster
Empty prune chip bag
Sigmund's scythe (wielded)
Sigmund's robe (worn) (2AC)

MAP
◼
║

Defeated: Ijyb, Robin, 12 other goblins, Terence, Sigmund

a) Attack
b) Parry
c) Feint
d) Flirt
e) Use Acid Spit
f) Use key
g) Use Ijyb's pants
h) Use Terence's pants
i) Use wand of enslavement with hair bow (16)
j) Use July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
k) Use prune chip cluster
l) Use empty prune chip bag

[WingedEspeon]

a).

[duvessa]

You slice Crazy Yiuf's left arm off with the scythe. He swings his Jarlsberg cheese with his right arm. You block the attack with your genitals. (-7 GP)

  Code:

HP: ====-------------- 4/18
PP: ============== 14/14
GP: ==------------ 2/14
AC: -4

Key
Ijyb's pants (1AC)
the cursed -7 helmet of Okawaru's Regard {Stlth-} (worn) (-6AC)
Terence's pants (1AC)
Wand of enslavement with hair bow (16)
July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
Prune chip cluster
Empty prune chip bag
Sigmund's scythe (wielded)
Sigmund's robe (worn) (2AC)

MAP
◼
║

Defeated: Ijyb, Robin, 12 other goblins, Terence, Sigmund

a) Attack
b) Parry
c) Feint
d) Flirt
e) Use Acid Spit
f) Use key
g) Use Ijyb's pants
h) Use Terence's pants
i) Use wand of enslavement with hair bow (16)
j) Use July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
k) Use prune chip cluster
l) Use empty prune chip bag

[WingedEspeon]

b).

[duvessa]

Crazy Yiuf swings his Jarlsberg cheese. You somehow manage to parry the cheese with your farming tool. This is a stupid game.

  Code:

HP: ====-------------- 4/18
PP: ============== 14/14
GP: ==------------ 2/14
AC: -4

Key
Ijyb's pants (1AC)
the cursed -7 helmet of Okawaru's Regard {Stlth-} (worn) (-6AC)
Terence's pants (1AC)
Wand of enslavement with hair bow (16)
July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
Prune chip cluster
Empty prune chip bag
Sigmund's scythe (wielded)
Sigmund's robe (worn) (2AC)

MAP
◼
║

Defeated: Ijyb, Robin, 12 other goblins, Terence, Sigmund

a) Attack
b) Parry
c) Feint
d) Flirt
e) Use Acid Spit
f) Use key
g) Use Ijyb's pants
h) Use Terence's pants
i) Use wand of enslavement with hair bow (16)
j) Use July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
k) Use prune chip cluster
l) Use empty prune chip bag

[WingedEspeon]

slice off his other arm so he can't attack

[duvessa]

You slice Crazy Yiuf's other arm off. He dies. Since you've taken all the possessions of the last 16 people you killed, you take Crazy Yiuf's stuff too. You go back to the healing fountain and heal, too. Unfortunately, no amount of healing water can restore your GP.
CRAZY YIUF DEFEATED
LEVEL UP
HP UP
PP UP
GP UP

  Code:

HP: ==================== 20/20
PP: =============== 15/15
GP: ===------------ 3/15
AC: -4

Key
Ijyb's pants (1AC)
the cursed -7 helmet of Okawaru's Regard {Stlth-} (worn) (-6AC)
Terence's pants (1AC)
Wand of enslavement with hair bow (16)
July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
Prune chip cluster
Empty prune chip bag
Sigmund's scythe (wielded)
Sigmund's robe (worn) (2AC)
Brick of Jarlsberg cheese
Crazy Yiuf's cloak (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's pants (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's hammer

MAP
◼
║

Defeated: Ijyb, Robin, 12 other goblins, Terence, Sigmund, Crazy Yiuf

a) Go up stairs
b) Go through south door
c) Go to specific room [I'm going to stop explicitly listing this option because it's always available unless you're fighting]
d) Raid fridge

[WingedEspeon]

d).

[n1000]

this is elaborate and obscure but I think i'm beginning to unravel the mystery

Spoiler: show

feature creep

[duvessa]

You open the refrigerator. It's full of bottles of Thunderdog. You take them.

  Code:

HP: ==================== 20/20
PP: =============== 15/15
GP: ===------------ 3/15
AC: -4

Key
Ijyb's pants (1AC)
the cursed -7 helmet of Okawaru's Regard {Stlth-} (worn) (-6AC)
Terence's pants (1AC)
Wand of enslavement with hair bow (16)
July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
Prune chip cluster
Empty prune chip bag
Sigmund's scythe (wielded)
Sigmund's robe (worn) (2AC)
Brick of Jarlsberg cheese
Crazy Yiuf's cloak (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's pants (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's hammer
39 bottles of Thunderdog wine

MAP
◼
║

Defeated: Ijyb, Robin, 12 other goblins, Terence, Sigmund, Crazy Yiuf

a) Go up stairs
b) Go through south door
c) Use 39 bottles of Thunderdog wine

[WingedEspeon]

b).

[nago]

Also wear crazy yiuf things

[duvessa]

You realize you forgot to unscrew the light bulb from Crazy Yiuf's ear and take it, so you do that. You also put on his cloak. You can't wear his pants, you've still got that cursed helmet stuck to your head.
You go through the south door. You find yourself in another room of the basement. This one also smells like piss and terrible alcohol. There are exits in all directions, a filthy toilet in the northeast corner, and miscellaneous junk strewn all over. In the centre of the room is a card table. Blork the orc, Edmund, Grinder, Grum, and Maurice are sitting around the table playing poker. They see you, drop their cards, and raise their weapons!

  Code:

HP: ==================== 20/20
PP: =============== 15/15
GP: ===------------ 3/15
AC: -3

Key
Ijyb's pants (1AC)
the cursed -7 helmet of Okawaru's Regard {Stlth-} (worn) (-6AC)
Terence's pants (1AC)
Wand of enslavement with hair bow (16)
July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
Prune chip cluster
Empty prune chip bag
Sigmund's scythe (wielded)
Sigmund's robe (worn) (2AC)
Light bulb
Brick of Jarlsberg cheese
Crazy Yiuf's cloak (worn) (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's pants (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's hammer
39 bottles of Thunderdog wine

MAP
  ◻
  ║
 ═◼═
  ║

Defeated: Ijyb, Robin, 12 other goblins, Terence, Sigmund, Crazy Yiuf

a) Attack
b) Parry
c) Feint
d) Flirt
e) Use Acid Spit
f) Use key
g) Use Ijyb's pants
h) Use Terence's pants
i) Use wand of enslavement with hair bow (16)
j) Use July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
k) Use prune chip cluster
l) Use empty prune chip bag
m) Use light bulb
n) Use brick of Jarlsberg cheese
o) Use Crazy Yiuf's cloak
p) Use Crazy Yiuf's pants
q) Use Crazy Yiuf's hammer
r) Use 39 bottles of Thunderdog wine

[nago]

r) or throw a party with the wine

[duvessa]

You hold your nose and start chugging one of the bottles of Thunderdog wine. Wait, this bottle is actually full of Crazy Yiuf's urine. A significant improvement. (+5 PP)
Blork the orc drunkenly slurs the words to Throw Flame. The toilet catches fire.
Maurice sneaks up and steals the light bulb from you, then pauses as he tries to figure out why he wanted the light bulb in the first place.
Grum bites you in the arm. (-4 HP)

  Code:

HP: ================---- 16/20
PP: ===============!!!!! 20/15
GP: ===------------ 3/15
AC: -3
WARNING: PP OVER MAXIMUM

Key
Ijyb's pants (1AC)
the cursed -7 helmet of Okawaru's Regard {Stlth-} (worn) (-6AC)
Terence's pants (1AC)
Wand of enslavement with hair bow (16)
July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
Prune chip cluster
Empty prune chip bag
Sigmund's scythe (wielded)
Sigmund's robe (worn) (2AC)
Brick of Jarlsberg cheese
Crazy Yiuf's cloak (worn) (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's pants (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's hammer
38 bottles of Thunderdog wine
Empty Thunderdog bottle

MAP
  ◻
  ║
 ═◼═
  ║

Defeated: Ijyb, Robin, 12 other goblins, Terence, Sigmund, Crazy Yiuf

a) Attack
b) Parry
c) Feint
d) Flirt
e) Use Acid Spit
f) Use key
g) Use Ijyb's pants
h) Use Terence's pants
i) Use wand of enslavement with hair bow (16)
j) Use July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
k) Use prune chip cluster
l) Use empty prune chip bag
m) Use brick of Jarlsberg cheese
n) Use Crazy Yiuf's cloak
o) Use Crazy Yiuf's pants
p) Use Crazy Yiuf's hammer
q) Use 38 bottles of Thunderdog wine
r) Use empty Thunderdog bottle

[WingedEspeon]

i) on grum

[duvessa]

You zap the wand of enslavement at Grum. Grum is enslaved.
Grinder casts Paralyse, but Grum jumps in front of you to save you. Grum is paralysed and suspended in mid-air.
Edmund hits you in the uvula with a spiked flail. (-5 HP)
You can't hold all this excess PP any longer. You begin spitting acid involuntarily. Some of it lands on Maurice's left foot. He begins hopping around on his right foot while clenching the left one in pain. He drops the light bulb on the ground and it shatters. The glass shards slice up his right foot as he hops around.

  Code:

HP: ===========--------- 11/20
PP: ===============!! 17/15
GP: ===------------ 3/15
AC: -3
WARNING: PP OVER MAXIMUM

Key
Ijyb's pants (1AC)
the cursed -7 helmet of Okawaru's Regard {Stlth-} (worn) (-6AC)
Terence's pants (1AC)
Wand of enslavement with hair bow (15)
July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
Prune chip cluster
Empty prune chip bag
Sigmund's scythe (wielded)
Sigmund's robe (worn) (2AC)
Brick of Jarlsberg cheese
Crazy Yiuf's cloak (worn) (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's pants (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's hammer
38 bottles of Thunderdog wine
Empty Thunderdog bottle

MAP
  ◻
  ║
 ═◼═
  ║

Defeated: Ijyb, Robin, 12 other goblins, Terence, Sigmund, Crazy Yiuf

a) Attack
b) Parry
c) Feint
d) Flirt
e) Use Acid Spit
f) Use key
g) Use Ijyb's pants
h) Use Terence's pants
i) Use wand of enslavement with hair bow (15)
j) Use July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
k) Use prune chip cluster
l) Use empty prune chip bag
m) Use brick of Jarlsberg cheese
n) Use Crazy Yiuf's cloak
o) Use Crazy Yiuf's pants
p) Use Crazy Yiuf's hammer
q) Use 38 bottles of Thunderdog wine
r) Use empty Thunderdog bottle

[WingedEspeon]

i) on Edmund

[duvessa]

You zap the wand of enslavement at Edmund. Edmund is enslaved.
Grinder casts Paralyse, but Edmund jumps in front of you to save you. Edmund is paralysed and suspended in mid-air.
Maurice stumbles around.
Blork the orc manages to pronounce the words to Magic Dart correctly. A magic dart hits you in the colon. (-5 HP)
You spit more acid involuntarily. It doesn't hit anything interesting.

  Code:

HP: ======-------------- 6/20
PP: =============== 15/15
GP: ===------------ 3/15
AC: -3

Key
Ijyb's pants (1AC)
the cursed -7 helmet of Okawaru's Regard {Stlth-} (worn) (-6AC)
Terence's pants (1AC)
Wand of enslavement with hair bow (14)
July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
Prune chip cluster
Empty prune chip bag
Sigmund's scythe (wielded)
Sigmund's robe (worn) (2AC)
Brick of Jarlsberg cheese
Crazy Yiuf's cloak (worn) (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's pants (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's hammer
38 bottles of Thunderdog wine
Empty Thunderdog bottle

MAP
  ◻
  ║
 ═◼═
  ║

Defeated: Ijyb, Robin, 12 other goblins, Terence, Sigmund, Crazy Yiuf

a) Attack
b) Parry
c) Feint
d) Flirt
e) Use Acid Spit
f) Use key
g) Use Ijyb's pants
h) Use Terence's pants
i) Use wand of enslavement with hair bow (14)
j) Use July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
k) Use prune chip cluster
l) Use empty prune chip bag
m) Use brick of Jarlsberg cheese
n) Use Crazy Yiuf's cloak
o) Use Crazy Yiuf's pants
p) Use Crazy Yiuf's hammer
q) Use 38 bottles of Thunderdog wine
r) Use empty Thunderdog bottle

[WingedEspeon]

i) on grinder

[daggaz]

If ever there was a moment to use hot faeries, it is now. J

[duvessa]

You zap the wand of enslavement at Grinder. Grinder is enslaved.
Grinder casts Paralyse at Maurice, but Blork the orc tries to jump in front of Maurice to save him. Blork trips and falls when he tries to jump. Blork is paralysed in mid-fall.
Maurice passes out.

  Code:

HP: ======-------------- 6/20
PP: =============== 15/15
GP: ===------------ 3/15
AC: -3

Key
Ijyb's pants (1AC)
the cursed -7 helmet of Okawaru's Regard {Stlth-} (worn) (-6AC)
Terence's pants (1AC)
Wand of enslavement with hair bow (13)
July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
Prune chip cluster
Empty prune chip bag
Sigmund's scythe (wielded)
Sigmund's robe (worn) (2AC)
Brick of Jarlsberg cheese
Crazy Yiuf's cloak (worn) (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's pants (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's hammer
38 bottles of Thunderdog wine
Empty Thunderdog bottle

MAP
  ◻
  ║
 ═◼═
  ║

Defeated: Ijyb, Robin, 12 other goblins, Terence, Sigmund, Crazy Yiuf, Blork the orc

a) Attack
b) Parry
c) Feint
d) Flirt
e) Use Acid Spit
f) Use key
g) Use Ijyb's pants
h) Use Terence's pants
i) Use wand of enslavement with hair bow (13)
j) Use July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
k) Use prune chip cluster
l) Use empty prune chip bag
m) Use brick of Jarlsberg cheese
n) Use Crazy Yiuf's cloak
o) Use Crazy Yiuf's pants
p) Use Crazy Yiuf's hammer
q) Use 38 bottles of Thunderdog wine
r) Use empty Thunderdog bottle

[daggaz]

Now we got them. J

[duvessa]

You present the July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies". But since everyone else is either paralysed, unconscious, or in your thrall, they don't react to it.

  Code:

HP: ======-------------- 6/20
PP: =============== 15/15
GP: ===------------ 3/15
AC: -3

Key
Ijyb's pants (1AC)
the cursed -7 helmet of Okawaru's Regard {Stlth-} (worn) (-6AC)
Terence's pants (1AC)
Wand of enslavement with hair bow (13)
July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
Prune chip cluster
Empty prune chip bag
Sigmund's scythe (wielded)
Sigmund's robe (worn) (2AC)
Brick of Jarlsberg cheese
Crazy Yiuf's cloak (worn) (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's pants (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's hammer
38 bottles of Thunderdog wine
Empty Thunderdog bottle

MAP
  ◻
  ║
 ═◼═
  ║

Defeated: Ijyb, Robin, 12 other goblins, Terence, Sigmund, Crazy Yiuf, Blork the orc

a) Attack
b) Parry
c) Feint
d) Flirt
e) Use Acid Spit
f) Use key
g) Use Ijyb's pants
h) Use Terence's pants
i) Use wand of enslavement with hair bow (13)
j) Use July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
k) Use prune chip cluster
l) Use empty prune chip bag
m) Use brick of Jarlsberg cheese
n) Use Crazy Yiuf's cloak
o) Use Crazy Yiuf's pants
p) Use Crazy Yiuf's hammer
q) Use 38 bottles of Thunderdog wine
r) Use empty Thunderdog bottle

[daggaz]

I meant q), forgot to get them drunk first...

[daggaz]

38 bottles of Thunderdog wine? This kills the thread..

[ydeve]

use crazy yuif's hammer and take out the gang

[duvessa]

You use Crazy Yiuf's hammer to shatter the bottom of one the bottles of Thunderdog wine, then stick the sharpened bottle into Grum's brain. His paralysis wears off at about the same time and he falls to the ground, dead.
Grinder clubs Maurice's unconscious body with his club of pain. You're pretty sure it was fatal.
You realize that you added Blork the orc to your list of defeated enemies by accident, but you decide to deal with that later.
The flaming toilet is starting to smell really bad.
DEFEATED GRUM
DEFEATED MAURICE

  Code:

HP: ======-------------- 6/20
PP: =============== 15/15
GP: ===------------ 3/15
AC: -3

Key
Ijyb's pants (1AC)
the cursed -7 helmet of Okawaru's Regard {Stlth-} (worn) (-6AC)
Terence's pants (1AC)
Wand of enslavement with hair bow (13)
July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
Prune chip cluster
Empty prune chip bag
Sigmund's scythe (wielded)
Sigmund's robe (worn) (2AC)
Brick of Jarlsberg cheese
Crazy Yiuf's cloak (worn) (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's pants (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's hammer
37 bottles of Thunderdog wine
Empty Thunderdog bottle

MAP
  ◻
  ║
 ═◼═
  ║

Defeated: Ijyb, Robin, 12 other goblins, Terence, Sigmund, Crazy Yiuf, Blork the orc, Grum, Maurice

a) Attack
b) Parry
c) Feint
d) Flirt
e) Use Acid Spit
f) Use key
g) Use Ijyb's pants
h) Use Terence's pants
i) Use wand of enslavement with hair bow (13)
j) Use July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
k) Use prune chip cluster
l) Use empty prune chip bag
m) Use brick of Jarlsberg cheese
n) Use Crazy Yiuf's cloak
o) Use Crazy Yiuf's pants
p) Use Crazy Yiuf's hammer
q) Use 37 bottles of Thunderdog wine
r) Use empty Thunderdog bottle

[Sprucery]

p) Use Crazy Yiuf's hammer

[duvessa]

You stick the claw of Crazy Yiuf's hammer up Edmund's nostrils. His paralysis wears off and he falls to the ground, dead.
Grinder vomits.
DEFEATED EDMUND
LEVEL UP
HP UP
PP UP
GP UP
LEARNED NEW ABILITY: FIRE BREATH

  Code:

HP: ========-------------- 8/22
PP: ================ 16/16
GP: ====------------ 4/16
AC: -3

Key
Ijyb's pants (1AC)
the cursed -7 helmet of Okawaru's Regard {Stlth-} (worn) (-6AC)
Terence's pants (1AC)
Wand of enslavement with hair bow (13)
July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
Prune chip cluster
Empty prune chip bag
Sigmund's scythe (wielded)
Sigmund's robe (worn) (2AC)
Brick of Jarlsberg cheese
Crazy Yiuf's cloak (worn) (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's pants (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's hammer
37 bottles of Thunderdog wine
Empty Thunderdog bottle

MAP
  ◻
  ║
 ═◼═
  ║

Defeated: Ijyb, Robin, 12 other goblins, Terence, Sigmund, Crazy Yiuf, Blork the orc, Grum, Maurice, Edmund

a) Attack
b) Parry
c) Feint
d) Flirt
e) Use Acid Spit
f) Use Fire Breath
g) Use key
h) Use Ijyb's pants
i) Use Terence's pants
j) Use wand of enslavement with hair bow (13)
k) Use July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
l) Use prune chip cluster
m) Use empty prune chip bag
n) Use brick of Jarlsberg cheese
o) Use Crazy Yiuf's cloak
p) Use Crazy Yiuf's pants
q) Use Crazy Yiuf's hammer
r) Use 37 bottles of Thunderdog wine
s) Use empty Thunderdog bottle

[daggaz]

Fire breath on Grinder because I hate that little f*er

[BugHunter]

How about taking a mouthful of Thunderdog wine, and *then* using fire breath on Grinder? Ought to give it a little extra kick.

[duvessa]

You breathe some fire onto the ground, igniting the alcohol on the floor. Blork's paralysis wears off and he finishes falling onto the floor, which is now on fire. He is engulfed in flame.
Grinder catches fire too.
You catch fire too.

  Code:

HP: ========-------------- 8/22
PP: ======---------- 6/16
GP: ====------------ 4/16
AC: -3
FIRE

Key
Ijyb's pants (1AC)
the cursed -7 helmet of Okawaru's Regard {Stlth-} (worn) (-6AC)
Terence's pants (1AC)
Wand of enslavement with hair bow (13)
July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
Prune chip cluster
Empty prune chip bag
Sigmund's scythe (wielded)
Sigmund's robe (worn) (2AC)
Brick of Jarlsberg cheese
Crazy Yiuf's cloak (worn) (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's pants (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's hammer
37 bottles of Thunderdog wine
Empty Thunderdog bottle

MAP
  ◻
  ║
 ═◼═
  ║

Defeated: Ijyb, Robin, 12 other goblins, Terence, Sigmund, Crazy Yiuf, Blork the orc, Grum, Maurice, Edmund

a) Attack
b) Parry
c) Feint
d) Flirt
e) Use Acid Spit
f) Use Fire Breath
g) Use key
h) Use Ijyb's pants
i) Use Terence's pants
j) Use wand of enslavement with hair bow (13)
k) Use July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies"
l) Use prune chip cluster
m) Use empty prune chip bag
n) Use brick of Jarlsberg cheese
o) Use Crazy Yiuf's cloak
p) Use Crazy Yiuf's pants
q) Use Crazy Yiuf's hammer
r) Use 37 bottles of Thunderdog wine
s) Use empty Thunderdog bottle

[WalrusKing]

K) Sit down and read your issue of Hot Fairies. It's finally an appropriate time.

[duvessa]

You pull out your July 2011 issue of "Hot Fairies". It catches fire too, and quickly burns to ash. You take solace in the knowledge that, for a brief moment, the fairies were the hottest they've ever been.
The flames lick at your flesh. (-1 HP) (-1 GP)
Blork the orc burns to death.
Grinder continues to burn while awaiting your command.
DEFEATED BLORK THE ORC

  Code:

HP: =======--------------- 7/22
PP: ======---------- 6/16
GP: ===------------- 3/16
AC: -3
FIRE

Key
Ijyb's pants (1AC)
the cursed -7 helmet of Okawaru's Regard {Stlth-} (worn) (-6AC)
Terence's pants (1AC)
Wand of enslavement with hair bow (13)
Prune chip cluster
Empty prune chip bag
Sigmund's scythe (wielded)
Sigmund's robe (worn) (2AC)
Brick of Jarlsberg cheese
Crazy Yiuf's cloak (worn) (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's pants (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's hammer
37 bottles of Thunderdog wine
Empty Thunderdog bottle

MAP
  ◻
  ║
 ═◼═
  ║

Defeated: Ijyb, Robin, 12 other goblins, Terence, Sigmund, Crazy Yiuf, Blork the orc, Grum, Maurice, Edmund

a) Attack
b) Parry
c) Feint
d) Flirt
e) Use Acid Spit
f) Use Fire Breath
g) Use key
h) Use Ijyb's pants
i) Use Terence's pants
j) Use wand of enslavement with hair bow (13)
k) Use prune chip cluster
l) Use empty prune chip bag
m) Use brick of Jarlsberg cheese
n) Use Crazy Yiuf's cloak
o) Use Crazy Yiuf's pants
p) Use Crazy Yiuf's hammer
q) Use 37 bottles of Thunderdog wine
r) Use empty Thunderdog bottle

[WingedEspeon]

Make sure I'm not taking any more fire damage and then wait letting grinder burn.

[duvessa]

You walk over to a part of the room that isn't on fire and pee on yourself until the flames go out.
You sadistically wait for Grinder to burn to death. He does, along with his club of pain. All the stuff on the floor burns out, too.
You go and heal at the fountain, then come back and take everything that isn't attached to the floor or walls. The toilet is still on fire.
DEFEATED GRINDER
LEVEL UP
HP UP
PP UP
GP UP

  Code:

HP: ======================== 24/24
PP: ================= 17/17
GP: ====------------- 4/17
AC: -3

Key
Ijyb's pants (1AC)
the cursed -7 helmet of Okawaru's Regard {Stlth-} (worn) (-6AC)
Terence's pants (1AC)
Wand of enslavement with hair bow (13)
Prune chip cluster
Empty prune chip bag
Sigmund's scythe (wielded)
Sigmund's robe (worn) (2AC)
Brick of Jarlsberg cheese
Crazy Yiuf's cloak (worn) (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's pants (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's hammer
37 bottles of Thunderdog wine
Empty Thunderdog bottle
54 scorched pornographic playing cards
Poker chips
Grum's pants (1AC)
Bag of wolf treats
Maurice's cloak (1AC)
Maurice's pants (1AC)
Edmund's flail of protection
Edmund's pants (1AC)
Blork the orc's scorched suspenders (0AC)
Blork the orc's scorched pants (1AC)
Grinder's scorched pants (1AC)

MAP
  ◻
  ║
 ═◼═
  ║

Defeated: Ijyb, Robin, 12 other goblins, Terence, Sigmund, Crazy Yiuf, Blork the orc, Grum, Maurice, Edmund

a) Go through north door
b) Go through east door
c) Go through south door
d) Go through west door
e) Use toilet
f) Use item

[daggaz]

Dont play cant win. Use the item, whatever it is.

[duvessa]

use item means im tired of typing out all the letters, you still have to actually pick an item

[daggaz]

Use the cloak.

[BugHunter]

g) add grinder to defeated list.

[duvessa]

You wear Maurice's cloak over Crazy Yiuf's cloak.

  Code:

HP: ======================== 24/24
PP: ================= 17/17
GP: ====------------- 4/17
AC: -2

Key
Ijyb's pants (1AC)
the cursed -7 helmet of Okawaru's Regard {Stlth-} (worn) (-6AC)
Terence's pants (1AC)
Wand of enslavement with hair bow (13)
Prune chip cluster
Empty prune chip bag
Sigmund's scythe (wielded)
Sigmund's robe (worn) (2AC)
Brick of Jarlsberg cheese
Crazy Yiuf's cloak (worn) (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's pants (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's hammer
37 bottles of Thunderdog wine
Empty Thunderdog bottle
54 scorched pornographic playing cards
Poker chips
Grum's pants (1AC)
Bag of wolf treats
Maurice's cloak (worn) (1AC)
Maurice's pants (1AC)
Edmund's flail of protection
Edmund's pants (1AC)
Blork the orc's scorched suspenders (0AC)
Blork the orc's scorched pants (1AC)
Grinder's scorched pants (1AC)

MAP
  ◻
  ║
 ═◼═
  ║

Defeated: Ijyb, Robin, 12 other goblins, Terence, Sigmund, Crazy Yiuf, Blork the orc, Grum, Maurice, Edmund, Grinder

a) Go through north door
b) Go through east door
c) Go through south door
d) Go through west door
e) Use toilet
f) Use item

[tedric]

so we can wear cloaks over cloaks, but not pants over pants? interesting.

while we're at it, let's toss on those Blorky suspenders.

[WalrusKing]

Do whatever it takes to equip all the clothing you can. WHATEVER IT TAKES

[duvessa]

You put on Blork the orc's suspenders. They're not helping.

  Code:

HP: ======================== 24/24
PP: ================= 17/17
GP: ====------------- 4/17
AC: -2

Key
Ijyb's pants (1AC)
the cursed -7 helmet of Okawaru's Regard {Stlth-} (worn) (-6AC)
Terence's pants (1AC)
Wand of enslavement with hair bow (13)
Prune chip cluster
Empty prune chip bag
Sigmund's scythe (wielded)
Sigmund's robe (worn) (2AC)
Brick of Jarlsberg cheese
Crazy Yiuf's cloak (worn) (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's pants (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's hammer
37 bottles of Thunderdog wine
Empty Thunderdog bottle
54 scorched pornographic playing cards
Poker chips
Grum's pants (1AC)
Bag of wolf treats
Maurice's cloak (worn) (1AC)
Maurice's pants (1AC)
Edmund's flail of protection
Edmund's pants (1AC)
Blork the orc's scorched suspenders (worn) (0AC)
Blork the orc's scorched pants (1AC)
Grinder's scorched pants (1AC)

MAP
  ◻
  ║
 ═◼═
  ║

Defeated: Ijyb, Robin, 12 other goblins, Terence, Sigmund, Crazy Yiuf, Blork the orc, Grum, Maurice, Edmund, Grinder

a) Go through north door
b) Go through east door
c) Go through south door
d) Go through west door
e) Use toilet
f) Use item

You can wear pants over pants. You just can't wear pants over a helmet.

[archaeo]

e).

[duvessa]

You flush the burning toilet. It backs up and overflows, spilling flaming sewage all over the floor. It smells even worse than it did beforehand.

  Code:

HP: ======================== 24/24
PP: ================= 17/17
GP: ====------------- 4/17
AC: -2

Key
Ijyb's pants (1AC)
the cursed -7 helmet of Okawaru's Regard {Stlth-} (worn) (-6AC)
Terence's pants (1AC)
Wand of enslavement with hair bow (13)
Prune chip cluster
Empty prune chip bag
Sigmund's scythe (wielded)
Sigmund's robe (worn) (2AC)
Brick of Jarlsberg cheese
Crazy Yiuf's cloak (worn) (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's pants (1AC)
Crazy Yiuf's hammer
37 bottles of Thunderdog wine
Empty Thunderdog bottle
54 scorched pornographic playing cards
Poker chips
Grum's pants (1AC)
Bag of wolf treats
Maurice's cloak (worn) (1AC)
Maurice's pants (1AC)
Edmund's flail of protection
Edmund's pants (1AC)
Blork the orc's scorched suspenders (worn) (0AC)
Blork the orc's scorched pants (1AC)
Grinder's scorched pants (1AC)

MAP
  ◻
  ║
 ═◼═
  ║

Defeated: Ijyb, Robin, 12 other goblins, Terence, Sigmund, Crazy Yiuf, Blork the orc, Grum, Maurice, Edmund, Grinder

a) Go through north door
b) Go through east door
c) Go through south door
d) Go through west door
e) Use toilet
f) Use item