The inevitable poetry thread

[Confidence Interval]

Try blank verse: unrhymed iambic pentameters.

[and into]

How about this (Not blank verse, as Confidence Interval suggested, but a stab at a different form):



A Limerick for Sigmund [REVISED]

I once met a man from the dungeon
With the charm of a flatfoot's truncheon.
So I asked, "Why do you
Always camp on D2?"
— "I'm getting the meats for a luncheon."

(Note to performers: Last line should be delivered in Sigmund's creepy voice.)

[Confidence Interval]

That's good but the scansion doesn't quite work on lines two and five.

[and into]

That's good but the scansion doesn't quite work on lines two and five.

Better?

[Grimm]

You'd better hope it's right; the last thing you want to do is arouse CI's dudgeon.

[and into]

You'd better hope it's right; the last thing you want to do is arouse CI's dudgeon.

But if I do, perhaps I can appease him with a gift of Funyuns?

[Grimm]

I think if you did that he would consider it a black mark upon your escutcheon.

[and into]

I think if you did that he would consider it a black mark upon your escutcheon.

I'm not worried; that's a theory I would not hang much on.

[moocowmoocow]

An orb spider spun an orb,
The orb it sped above the ground.
And there was moocow with his sword;
He heard a noise and turned around -
Explosion loud, a rain of gore
Upon the dungeon walls and floor.

[xentronium]

Let me tell you bout something incredible,
all those spiders you et are inedible!

[pickled_heretic]

I didn't know dudgeon was a word
until I read this thread
this thread

[moocowmoocow]

Oh Lily is a minotaur
With orange hair and axe guitar
And candy smile and voice so sweet
She sends the furries into heat.

She is a match for any dude
(at +2 fighting aptitude).
O Lily you're worth more than gold;
Why was I born an octopode?

[tasonir]

I bet lily is into that, you shouldn't write yourself off just yet.

Imho there's not enough love for limericks here, clearly the finest form of poetry. Haikus are terrible.

There once was a friendly Naga Monk
Whose body had accumulated an incredible funk
Slaying monsters in cold blood,
While their entrails hit him like a flood,
It's no wonder that Naga so terribly stunk!

I always have trouble making the two short lines short enough. Ah well.

[thromnambular]

There once was a Naga Monk
Whose body had an awful funk
He slayed in cold blood,
And got splattered with crud,
It's no wonder that Naga so terribly stunk!

I tried.

[tasonir]

Format of limericks: 5 lines, with rhyme scheme AABBA. The A lines are long, the B lines are short. They are typically crude and/or sexual. Much better than haikus, which are supposed to be about nature. I like your short lines better, but you usually want to leave the lines 1, 2 and 5 somewhat longer, so don't shorten those

[thromnambular]

Format of limericks: 5 lines, with rhyme scheme AABBA. The A lines are long, the B lines are short. They are typically crude and/or sexual. Much better than haikus, which are supposed to be about nature. I like your short lines better, but you usually want to leave the lines 1, 2 and 5 somewhat longer, so don't shorten those

Ah, I didn't know there was an actual format. I just thought a limerick was a dirty rhyme.
edit: original content -

there once was a god named cheibriados
whose conduct made most players say, "gross"
but one player, near crazy, said
"It's better to be lazy"
And won games with the slovenly god the most

third time's the charm, I can't read

[tasonir]

Apparently the definition is the long lines are 3 metric feet, and the short lines are 2 metric feet, but I've never really understood meter in poetry, so I just call them "long" and "short".

[thromnambular]

there once was a man from nantucket
whose MiFi was good so he said "fuck it"
he tabbed with a grin,
but lost it soon when
his poor MiFi went and kicked the bucket

and now I'm done spamming this thread

[moocowmoocow]

there once was a man from nantucket
whose MiFi was good so he said "fuck it"
he tabbed with a grin,
but lost it soon when
his poor MiFi went and kicked the bucket

and now I'm done spamming this thread

This thread is meant to be spammed It's all in good fun.

[moocowmoocow]

I don't think I've ever tried a limmerick before. Hmmm.

Ogre mage sent me to the abyss,
And needless to say I was pissed.
But then there was Lucy,
With bosom so juicy,
I forgot anything was amiss.

[moocowmoocow]

The most glorious race ever known
Once called Dungeon Crawl Stone Soup their home.
Til the devs did decide
To commit genocide;
Can a cat fill a mountain dwarf's throne?

[xentronium]

Fountain dwarf: can only heal while standing on a fountain.

[Shtopit]

If I were a deep dwarf
And you were a lady
Would you marry me anyway
Would you have my babies?